LONELINESS

All of us are lonely at times, and this just normal. But when loneliness is excessive and chronic —of being cut off and alienated from other people— it is a symptom of the failure mechanism. In a stimulating conversation, in dancing, playing together, or in working together for a common goal, we become interested in something other than maintaining our own shams and pretenses. As we get to know the other fellow, we feel less need for pretense. We "unthaw" and become more natural. The more we do this the more we feel we can afford to dispense -with the sham and pretense and feel more comfortable just being ourselves, and finding ourselves.


Lonely person cuts himself off from the pathway to finding himself, which is to lose oneself in social activities with other people. Doing things with other people and enjoying things with other people, helps us to forget ourselves. Thus, alienation from life causes alienation from real self. Because of his feeling of alienation from self, human contacts are not very satisfying, and he becomes a social recluse. Thus, the lonely person often sets up a vicious cycle.