(4) CHARITY

Successful personalities have some interest in and re­gard for other people. They have a respect for others' problems and needs. They respect the dignity of human personality and deal with other people as if they were human beings, rather than as pawns in their own game. They recognize that every person is a child of God and is a unique individuality which deserves some dignity and respect.

It is -a psychologic fact that our feelings about ourselves tend to correspond to our feelings about other people. When a person begins to feel more charitably about others, he invariably begins to feel more charitably to­ward himself. The person who feels that "people are not very important" cannot have very much deep-down self-respect and self-regard—for he himself is "people" and with what judgment he considers others, he himself is un­wittingly judged in his own mind. One of the best known methods of getting over a feeling of guilt is to stop con­demning other people in your own mind—stop judging them—stop blaming them and hating them for their mistakes. You will develop a better and more adequate self-image when you begin to feel that other people are more worthy.

Another reason that Charity toward other people is symptomatic of the successful personality is because it means that the person is dealing with reality. People are important. People cannot for long be treated like ani- ; mals or machines, or as pawns to secure personal ends. Hitler found this out. So will other tyrants wherever they may be found—in the home, in business, or in individ­ual relationships.

Prescription: The prescription for charity is three-fold: (1) Try to develop a genuine appreciation for people by realizing the truth about them; they are children of God, unique personalities, creative beings. (2) Take the trouble to stop and think of the other person's feelings, his view­points, his desires and needs. Think more of what the other fellow wants, and how he must feel. A friend of mine kids his wife by telling her, whenever she asks him, "Do you love me?"—"Yes, whenever I stop and think about it." There is a lot of truth in this. We cannot feel anything about other people unless we "stop and think" about them. (3) Act as if other people are important and [ treat them accordingly. In your treatment of people have regard for their feelings. We tend to feel about objects in accordance with the way we treat them.